Saturday, January 31, 2009
Had to go into the Tenancy Tribunal by myself for the first time yesterday, was very thrilling.
Got the nasty blonde reconcilliation lady who always favors the tenant and treats the agent like a piece of poo...bitchfacemole we will call her.
So, poor shaking tenant who cries (on tap) and has managed to get her rent up to date finally didnt get kicked out and an order to pay rent on time was obtained and an afternoon was wasted again.
Oh well....her lease is up in April and I will take pleasure in kicking her out for no reason if she doesnt pull up her socks in the meantime.
I have turned into an unsympathetic bitchfromhellproperty person :)
Isnt that nice.
My house smells like dog
My daughters are filthy beasts
I went to bed at 7pm last night and slept till 5am!
I need to mow my lawn so the dog will poo on it instead of my verandah! Poor diddums musnt like the grass tickling his bum......GRRRRRR
I think I will buy myself a whippersnipper so I can do it without having to rely on darlin being here as he has the lawn mowing tools permanently installed at his house these days...
My period is coming...for one of the LAST TIMES YAY
I am thinking hysterectomy is a nice word indeedy
In my family on the female side there is a history of misbehaving uteruses (uterii)
so I was only looking forward to years of revolting bleeding and horrible stuff anyway
Better out than in I think
Plus I have had abnormal cervical cells in the past so I think they can have that too
and if I didnt need my ovaries I would tell em to whip them out too!
Knowing my luck it will happen on my birthday :(
I am boring
It is early
Friday, January 30, 2009
I am informed by my doctor of the gyneacological variety that the uterus must come out
It just keeps growing and is now the size of a four month pregnancy, and will continue to do so until I become 25 months pregnant with nothing or it falls out my arse, so to speak.
This is why I am constantly peeing, having back pain and not pooing correctly.
I should say, the fibroids attached to my uterus actually.
On the outside, not the inside, where if they were there they could be lasered out, but the outside, which means hysterectomy of not the vaginal kind because it is most likely just too big.
So, sometime in the next 90 days I will be doing this thing
All going according to plan
And then I will be unable to lift or drive for a couple of weeks
Which will require me to need some slaves...yipee
I do get to keep my ovaries
I wont get to have half a month every month bleeding like a stuck pig anymore!
I wont be able to produce any late in life offspring dammit...heeeeeee
Im sure there are more things I need to know
but that will do for a start
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
Am wondering why we must always question (ahhh ...ironic I know).
Some things just are.
And no amount of thinking or arguing about them can make them any more explicable or comfortable or justifiable.
Some things just are, and we are'nt meant to know why, or we would.
I find that there are things that I just 'know', like them or not, and that, for me, is 'truth'.
Just a word.
And it just is.
In my experience, these are the things I need to accept, without question, because 'question' just does my head in.
A large lesson I have learnt in this life is that I have no control, over anything really.
Except my own actions.
Note I do not include reactions in this.
What I do defines how comfortable I am in my self.
Each day I have choices about my own comfortability.
And each day there are certain things I choose NOT to engage in because they fuck with my head.
Constantly questioning the 'whys' is one of these things.
Lying to myself is another.
For obvious reasons I would have thought.
Some things just 'are'
and the quicker I get to acceptance, the more peace I have.
That is MY truth...for want of a better word :)
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
Monday, January 26, 2009
Today I had to take K to buy some school shoes
This is generally a nightmare of epic proportions as she hates all shoes and only ever likes a certain type of canvas tennis shoe made in Thailand.....
however all other years have seen us traipsing through every shoe shop on the continent and still coming away empty handed
Walked into the shop, AND it was payless and less than $50, and walked out in 5 mins WITH a pair of school shoes that she LIKED....
I am in shock
Aside from that I have been semi productive in that I have bleached all the used to be white things white again
And sewn up school skirts that needed doing
And thats about it
Energy levels are very low and I still want to sleep for a week
Had a chat to sister while putting her on the plane home yesterday about her needing to get down as much as possible now, for her sake......this was a hitting home unpleasant thing
Tahni is coming home on Wednesday for a couple of days so that is cool too
Back to the orifice for a busy week of crap tomorrow
Mum did have several phone calls in response to ad in the Herald
Have been speaking to lost son in Germany...I sent him chocolate the other week and it cost me $33 postage! To send $10 worth of chocolate and 2 tubes of zit cream....hee hee.....but he is missing chocolate and is too stingey to buy any for himself
So mummy is cool....
Shelli is still intact and not cutting, feeling ok. We will see how she goes back at school hmmm.
She has a boyfriend so that is distracting for her I suppose. Hmmmmm
She also now has her nose pierced on both sides because I am a sucker
Ex husband has bought a house now.....not wasting anytime is he. It does not have a spare room for my girls. They are not impressed much.
I am on auto pilot and that suits me just fine for now
And the beat goes on......la de da di dah
Sunday, January 25, 2009
It doesnt feel like I was
Not for long enough thats for sure
But it was a nice week
and soooooo frikken hot driving back yesterday with no air con...I thought I was going to melt
So, now I am here again
And nothing has changed
They all had a nice week together.
Mum has a swollen up left foot and is feeling more breathless
Little brother bought a house yesterday!
Almost 22 and a house owner/payerfor.....I am driven to compare childhoods here and ponder on the fact that we did come from the same parent.....hmmmm
Its nice and cool this morning but I am hoping for some sun today, I have 47 loads of washing to do!
Thats about it folks, I am boring
Friday, January 16, 2009
Thursday, January 15, 2009
A few of them
We will call them mozzies shall we
they like to wake me up all night and so I wake puppyson up all night who then would like to go out and do wees and poos and things please
Pet mozzies are no fun and they bite
I will be killing them all tonight and also shutting the screen door too
I have been up since 4frikken AM and I dont have any bloody babies!
On a good pet note, since doing the carpets with Nil Odour in the machine on Sunday I have had NOT ONE SINGLE wee inside, or poo....how good is that. Puppyson is also having to get used to being outside on his own for several hours a day...he does not like this but I tell him it is a real world here dog!
I also tip a jug of water on his head from the balcony if he gets too loud with his protests.
He doesnt like that either.......:)
I will be hiring a Citronella spraying bark collar device if he keeps it up but he is getting better so this may not be necessary......he definately wouldnt like that
Enough of animals
2 days till I go away!
I am not even organised one little bit
Lucky darlin has got the camping things out and they are ready to go
I will pack some stuff tonight I spose and must stock cupboards with kid and pet fodder so sister doesnt know how slack I am...
In light of yesterdays visit to the hospital I am aware that this may be my only time out for some time to come so I will be doing lots of nothing....
I am a bit numb on that one I think, or else just accepting, or maybe a bit of both. Lets face it, its been coming for the last year hasn't it. I would like a bit more information and something resembling a time frame but I cant see me getting one. I keep getting 6 months.....frik
You know, besides the obvious stuff, the hardest thing is going to be helping my little brother deal with it all. He is only 22 for gods sake. He is supposed to have his mum around for a lot longer than this.
That man has not come back to us about buying the business. I think they (the other agents around here) are all just playing vulture and waiting for the rentals to be floating around in thin air to be picked up. Well, that wont bloody happen if I can help it. Mum will give it to me. And then I will do what? argh
Not worrying about that just yet. If I had time to get my RE License I would but I am only one person here....I would need to hire someone with a license to make it legal and would that make it worth it for me? Possibly. Hmmmm
But that is projecting too far and is only a possibility.
Rather that than let mums years of hard slog go to the carrion eaters!
Anyway, its now 6am and I should be getting up!
Wednesday, January 14, 2009
They were 44 just before she had surgery
So we are back to that square now
Having a CAT scan and a review in 6 weeks from now
They will discuss chemo then if they feel its necessary or useful
She got a shock
Tuesday, January 13, 2009
Am feeling slighlty better this morning after a huge blast of darlin' energy last night ( and a foot massage and a back tickle:0)....I can only handle his 'touch', healing wise, for a few minutes and then my head spins and I want to vomit
Sounds awful doesnt it.....he is very strong in that regard though and for some reason, these days I cant handle ANYONE giving me a healing, so to last a couple of minutes was a good thing. I think?
Usually I just say no but something wanted me to so I did
Its a vibration thing, I know, and not anyones negativity or 'fault'.
Just me not needing to be 'touched' that way...
Oh poo, Lisa will know what I mean...
Suffice it to say that during ascension strange things happen that render 'old' modalities useless and sometimes harmful to some, okay? My truth only.
Anyway, am still going to quack to get anti biotics today, and to get a Kayla script, and a mum script, and then a shelli counselling......ah these are the days of my life etc etc poooooooo
I am a treadmill hornbag by the way...under the inch(es) of flab there are the beginnings of buns and thighs of steel I tell you......poooo
Am tired and need to pee
But there are worse things to be for sure
Facing the day with a smile
Its good for the turkey neck
Monday, January 12, 2009
Does this entail bloated sore to touch belly, very frequent peeing, slightly green pee, feverish, headachy.......sob
I havent had one for years so dont really remember but I am thinking this is what it is
Will go to quack tomorrow anyway so will check it out then
Its been a long day that has gone really fast, I know that didnt make sense but there you go
I wonder if my Joshua reads my blog??
If you do kiddo, I miss you :0)
Busy week this week
The biggest one is mums oncology appointment on Wednesday
She is whinging and bitching because she is scared
On with it yes?
Sunday, January 11, 2009
Ive been painting
Just some littlies to play with
Wonders will never cease
And I have cleaned the carpets
With some help from Dobby House Elf
and Dobby has mown the lawn
And the dog is clean and schmick and naughty
And we started the quilt
AND I put my clothes away
Some day off......
This is my little alter
And this is my goddess type thingy who's tits blew off in the firing so I stuck em back on
Now I am stuffed
Dobby is stuffed
We had garlic prawns for dinner
so we stink
and its time for bed
And that my dears, is that
oh yes, AND I changed the dead light bulbs that have been driving me nuts for months
Saturday, January 10, 2009
It keeps me amused and sane
Why the frik would someone go on the computer to play a WORD game and think he will pick up a chicky to watch him have sex with himself on webcam???
Do people do this crap??
People are weird for sure
My house is a little cleaner looking now after a vigorous attack with Victor the Vacc and Mouldy the Mop
Wilfred Washing Machine has been given a seeing to as well.
Unfortunatley Michelle the Maid isnt playing and wont put any of her clothes away
Ho farkin hum
But I am a hit on facebook for sure
people want to have virtual sex with me
and other ones just like my work
Too blooody goooooddddd
Wishing Helen a nice evening
Friday, January 09, 2009
It may be a while coming however
As the conversations I have with me in my head these days dont quite ever make it out through my fingers
I am also looking forward to being inspired again one day
I have prepared a canvas
It is sitting there staring at me and has been for weeks
Everytime I go to do something with it, I stop, unable to formulate an idea that is floating somewhere beyond my reach for now
I would normally say to someone else, "just start", but I cant, not yet, not just for the sake of it
I know I am in here somewhere
Im just not quite sure who "I" is right now
That same me yes, but wait there's more.....
For now its like I am just floating along, doing the days as they come, with no particular enthusiasm or meaning, just doing......
And that, in spite of how that may sound to you, is quite okay with me, weird yes, but okay too
I do feel that I am actually just where I am supposed to be and that the floating is necessary
I will know when its time to swim
and its not yet
I do not question why, that would just drive me insane
Its okay for now
And that is all really
So, I distract myself with silly things, just to keep me awake some days
I think in short bursts
I 'do' the stuff that needs to be 'done'
Its all an illusion you know
The trick is to see through it and begin to grasp the importance of nothing
and just enjoy the 'whatever' as it comes
Remember this??? I almost forgot.....
Thursday, January 08, 2009
Wednesday, January 07, 2009
Tuesday, January 06, 2009
Those of you who have seen it will know what I mean
Well, I just did it on the T-word and you know what
It burned 16 calories???
Frik that said I
So I had an iceblock to get them back
My legs hurt
In a good kind of way
frikken tenant bitch from hell
Am going to peruse the Ascension Guide
and go to bed
Sounds like a plan
Just dropped Shelli and friend down at the swimming hole thing
It is dark and they are mad but what the hell
You are only 15 once
Walking is really good exercise you know?
10 minutes going up an incline at 3 km's an hour has me pooped
This machine will be our friend
We will love it and feed it and ....
I AM NOT OBSESSIVE
So, I will have skinny leags and love handles??
Better fix that
Ok I will shut up
So, what do you want to talk about??
Monday, January 05, 2009
They have given me Carer Payment
I suppose me caring for 3 people 38 hours a day saves the government quite a bit really
I also got a bonus backpay for some strange reason but I will not argue about it oh no
Mind you, they are only paying for my care of 2 people but what the heck, fair is fair, I didnt expect it for K, she is ok on the anti depressant thank frik
We can eat now AND have the internet
I am grateful
My treadmill finally came
Its a beauty
I used it for 15 minutes and am half dead
That will change
It does hills and everything
I dont do hills very well
My arse is getting smaller already from fear of the treadmill
and spray tans only cost $30....apparently they dont do any shades of orange either, damn
so pleased I am
Its rather hot
and will be hotter tomorrow
and hotter still on Wednesday
wont that be pleasant
You guys are not blogging enough I must say
Up the anti people
or is that ante????
Muggle where is that sprinkler? I want to bury my dog under it...
Sunday, January 04, 2009
BECAUSE IT BLOODY IS
the swimwear shop I mentioned in my earlier post does not exist
I know this because I spent all day looking for it today
I have bought some swimmers
I will lose 5 kilos in 2 weeks
and someone tell me a magic cellulite makergoawayer please
I am old and have produced 4 kids
and am lazy
and eat too much crap
I have decided that a spray tan before I go will be a good idea
At least a tan helps disguise a wobbly gigantic pitted arse a bit
Lucky I own lots of sarongs
DJ's have nice swimmers but even on sale they are rather expensive
I will now lose weight because I cant afford to eat!
Saturday, January 03, 2009
I am a busy beaverish type person
Now I am a trackydakked type dag
Gotta love tenants who move in somewhere to escape beating boyfriends only to ask to move out so you sign up a new tenant and then tenant decides they dont want to move out 2 days before they are due to be gone and then SEND THEIR THUGS BOYFRIENDS DOWN to THREATEN YOU.....told you my job was dangerous!
Lucky I had my 5 foot tall mother who has cancer there to tell him to piss off....tough lady my mum
Shelli and I are alone at home. She, btw, is doing quite well this week. Seems to have settled right down. Phew for now. She also thinks she has secrets but I know better
This is because I am psychic and was also 15 many centuries ago.
I am bored....whinge whinge
See what happens when you arent exhausted...grrrrr
I tried on all my swimmers and they all tell me my arse is far too fat and my thighs are not pretty....GRRRR
I am going to go find a swimmmers shop who specialise in making fat arses look good!
I may have to go to another country of course, one where fat arses are the in thing, but hey, whatever...
I have purchased a treadmill did I tell you?
A superdooper thing that I will be paying off for the next 10 years but its worth it I figure
My girls need daily walking, depression needs daily walking, as do giant fat arses, and so walk we shall....it comes on Monday and by next Monday I will tell you how slim my FA is now okay.
Yes indeed I will
I will be taking all my pants up very soon
Am also going to investigate one of those WII things that people are raving about. Not so much for me, I know my laziness has no limit, but the girls want to lose weight, and need to really, so whatever it takes yes?
Time for action here
Enough of fatness
You know my little hideously expensive fluffball kitten? Well, it is the nicest little cat we have ever had. She is so cute and friendly. Im sure she thinks she is a puppy....
I am reaching for things to say here....
Oh yes, not to stress muggle, beloved was not here.....promise
Neither was Fat Bastard mary, just in case you went there.....
Friday, January 02, 2009
Realised consequently that I forgot sex is better than valium
But enough of that.....
Month end was hell today but gotten through
I am tired but not woeful
Have just eaten pork chop with much salad and am now going to balance it out with a Magnum
Because life's like that
Then I am going to bed
Because I can
Finding gratitude that the day after tomorrow is Sunday
It also costs nothing to be polite. I must remind some of my tenants that I am just doing a JOB not trying to ruin their life
and start checking my car for explosive devices
Thursday, January 01, 2009
Probably because today is the first day I have felt human in weeks
Never mind that its back to orifice tomorrow
It IS a New Year!!
This year I will
- try to keep it very simple
- find gratitude more often
- enjoy the time I get with my mother and be grateful I am able to be here
- NOT kill any tenants
- Train my wayward puppyson
- Be firm with my daughter but love her warts and all
That will do.
I will also be having an open house barbeque type gathering when I come back from Hat Head, where I AM going regardless of whether the arse falls out of the world!
And you will hopefully all come, those of you who are within driving distance
Even WW should be finished CCing by then yes?
Negativity will get me nowwhere....I must get more rest or I will go mad
I will try!
Love you guys