ok

Survived festivus

sanity almost intact

my brother in law is a pompous arse

my son is an asshole

my mother is trying to pickle cancer with alcohol

all is well

time to get serious now

watch out people

grrrrr

to you

Merry Festivus to you all

see you soon

xxxxxxxxxxxxx

whaaa....

Feeling a bit more human today after a day of doing nothing much and another to look forward to

Back to the grind tomorrow

My sister has arrived at mums so I can breath

Shopping is all done bar the fruit and veg, which will be ridiculously expensive on xmas eve but what else is new?

wont even mention fuel...

Had noice coffees and cheesecakes with real people last night so the world is still turning

Darlin thinks I have left him for scrabble because thats how I turn my head off

The bad thing is that now Ive had time to wind down I am feeling the fear.....cancer, my god!

Chemo, hair loss, vomiting, offices........moving!

I think I will have to move us over to Backpassage in order to be able to cope

It seems the most sensible thing to do right now

My children will not love me

hmmmmmmmm

Enough...Im going to scrabble before my head explodes

better than drugs yes???

wilt i shall be awake at dawn saysimus I...??

"Whynt cha gedda broyne wontcha fug ya"

I love driving at Christmas time, especially when the bus in front of you stops and leaves you stranded in the middle of a keep clear zone in peak hour

People are so kind

I flipped him the bird of course, in keeping with traditional Christmas spirit

and waited and let 30 people turn left in front of me

just to keep him in line

turdman

any hoo, I am here

I have been asleep for two hours

my feet hurt

my back aches

I need to get over it

and on with it

oh dear

xxxxxxxxxxxxx

okay...

Saw head honcho at Oncology.....VERY head honcho director of joint guy

He says the cancer is very treatable and that her chances are good

Surgery asap...which in public hospital speak means the next 30 days mind you

then 6 months chemo, local and intravenous to get the bits they miss


I am sorry to be short but the day has been veeerrryyyy long, and the one before, and the one before.....and many more to come I imagine

Thank you for your wishes people...please send healing to Sandra

and strength to me

more later

xxxxxxx

and

Appointment at Oncology this afternoon

update

Briefly, because I am too fucked to do more right now

My mum has a tumour 12cm x 9cm x 8cm which used to be her right ovary....it seems to be contained but for a small amount of fluid, which is good and not

No other organs seem to be afflicted at this point

Went for a CAT scan this arvo and off to docs and probably hospital tomorrow to get the fucker out....

Then I dont know

maybe chemo...

Ho ho ho

@#$%##

sigh

are we there yet???

plurgh

grunt

snort

growl

sniff

blurt

owww

snore

descriptive writing at its finest yes

ha ha

I have seen funnier things than my cat

who has been eating strings of tinsel off the festy bush

tearing around the house with twinkly strings of poo balls hanging out of its bum!!

Im sure I have

but not today....

Now

off to Hades

or

Hell in a Box

practising gratitude

I am grateful for the 34 turns of scrabble that awaited me this morning

I am grateful for the opportunity to work in backpassage AND Hades in the same 24 hour period

I am grateful for................

oh fark

How lucky can one girl be!!!!

:o)

slice of life

Reading comments from last post has prompted me to elaborate a touch

This is the guy whom I left because he didn't mind punching me around with babies in my arms or in my belly...

This is the guy who showed my 4, 3 and 1 year old a gun and bullets telling them they had my name on them and so hasn't seen these kids for 12 years....

This is the guy I am sending my son to for Christmas

Get it???

This is not about fathers who show up occasionally, I wish it was

While I don't believe he will hurt Josh, I am struggling with it all.....

But he is a big boy now and needs to know....

Fark it

lifes like that

You know how it is when your head is full and your hands are heavy

Yep

Lots going on in my life right now

Lots of shit from my past coming up for me with the arrival of my ex in my sons life

Josh is going to him for christmas and I feel like I am sending him to the monster under the bed

and it hurts that 12 years down the track this arsehole has me reeling yet again

I swore he would never hurt me again and yet here I am again

I wish he had just conveniently died sometime

oh well

life goes on

and it looks like my mother may be really quite sick

will know more by next week but the quack is concerned enough to be rushing her through tests before xmas

grrrrr

the daughter stealing Catholic bastards will have my daughter for xmas and I wont

whinge bitch moan x 34523

I will prevail!

I will.....

farking gobshites

on the bright side?

It will rain today

Someone will enjoy that I suppose

sorry

grrrr sob moan sigh

poo

thats enough of this!

yawn...... )0(

Ogod

I am so slack arent I

all been frantic havent you

i am not punctuating...cant be snaggered

I am soooooo good

I got all my xmas shopping done in a day and a half

one pressie left to find and only because its for my little brother (who is 6' 2") and he is a pain because he never 'wants anything'...

well, maybe I will get him nothing and see if he can manage a request next year!

It was very nice to have the money to just go and buy.....I like it a lot

better make some more now so I can buy more stuff!!

Just like that heh!

hrmph

anyhoo, its done

thank fark

what else I hear you ask???

Well, back passage of course....which I am now receiving renumeration for, due to selling of many houses due to excellent positive energy influx of my good self of course.....

not much renumeration but still, better than paperclips for sure

and a haircut too. I got a haircut.....

and a clean ish house, I managed one of those as well

I only have 12 things in my washing basket....a rough estimate as I refuse to count

I have not put my bush up for display yet

I am waiting to see if anyone around here notices

It is entirely possible they wont until 3 days before C day

I slept for 3 hours this arvo and will now be up all night so as to get suitably exhausted before hoing ay Hades tomorrow......

and scrabulous is offline due to getting better,,,bastards!

I have 43 games waiting for me you know

gosh bosh

I wish someone would come clean out my fridge for me

poo

good bye

xxxxxxx

was a good day

this is quick

tired

exhausted

aching

head is rolling around shoulders

It was a great day and I am now not worried about paying for xmas!

zzzzz