- Big hair does not only grow out of your head.
- Big hair can be nasty and gets caught in sunglasses, on door handles, in silly bloody door hangy things at certain cottages and especially in bathroom drains.
- Big hair smothers darlins in thier sleep
- Big hair makes HUGE pony tails that actually resemble large trees with strange parastic growths
- Big hair is heavy
- Big hair makes big sweat
- Big hair gets caught in your bum crack! (I can see a calender in that!)
......another sad tale of big hairyness is that, yes, big curly hair grows out your legs too. This requires constant struggle with chemical poisons for controlling purposes. Tonight I decided that it was time for a mow and did open new packet of said chemical and discover a TOOL. Yes a big hair scraper offerer to work with stinky chemical poison. Excellent thought I.....
...a new and better way to poison oneself, most gooderer indeedy........3 minutes later I was scraping copious amounts of big leg hair away, mowing, mowing, much good, yay.......
10 minutes later I have large red scrapy marks all up beautiful hairless walking apparatus! NOT GOODER. Not at all. I will surely have to sue hair removal company now because red scrapy things are even ooglier than long curly leg hairs in my book, yes indeed.
THEN......I get into lovely bath with bubbles and stuff and bathe poor scrapy legs and bounteous body and relax and all nice things.....I get out and what do I see in the bath?
A daddy long legs!!!!! Floating, floating...........dead dead dead
I know that it wasn't there before...
I did scrub the bathroom muchly this afternoon in my piteous attempt to be housewiferly, it was spick!, so that only leaves me to wonder with dread...
Where did it come from?????