Monday, November 01, 2010

It appears I am here....


Seems there are only so many games of Bejewelled Blitz I can stand to play and only so many days I can procrastinate on going about life for and also maybe only so many thoughts I can keep inside one little head without exploding.

I love my family and I love my K .....but this is not enough and it is also all too much. That doesn't make any sense I know, but that's how it is.

I am overwhelmed, underwhelmed and lacking any impetus to move my feet forward at the moment.

I am floundering here inside me or I woud be if I had the energy to flounder.

And I don't know why.

And I don't like it.

I am also sick of whinging.



Lisa said...

i love that line about them not being enough, yet also too much. i feel that too and it messes with your/my mind.
i think it is conditioning to some extent, like- now you have this, this, and this, you should be happy...........

I am writing- finally have an idea that goes past chapter four and having that creativity is helping ease the guilt a bit.

I will see you soon
and i can validate all your pain and confusion

Lisa xx

Kristy-Lee said...

Sounds awful.

Sounds familiar.

Take a breath.


Anonymous said...

So good to see you back here! And I get the "confusion!" I am there as well. Perhaps it is the time of year?????


christopher said...

This is why I never assume people go for good, even though they usually do.

I am happy to have you appear. I am not happy that you are conflicted but nevertheless your place in my heart has been silent for so long. Now you have moved in again and you stirring there feels right.

Michelle said...

Hello favourite people :)

Cyndy said...

Good. It brings you back to putting thoughts out there instead of in there. That's a good thing. I get the urge and plan to blog, but don't get there.

As you say, too much but not enough. I think that if I didn't have work to go to, I would go to ground in my unfinished little home. And would stay there. And it wouldn't get finished as I have an overwhelming abundance of nil-motivation.

You won't flounder. You haven't at any point. It's just that the demands upon you aren't what they were before, and it's hard to not have that diversion. The corner you're on is a long, long one, but you're not going around the bend.

It's lovely to see you back. Facebook is boring.


Natalie said...

Need to connect to spirit?