Friday, October 27, 2006

stuff

  • washing your hair is a great way to remove ink from under fingernails. A real time saver but not recommended for public places
  • typing with wet nails is not particularily a time saver
  • neither is cleaning the toilet with the cat
  • cooking a vege burger in a pan full of dead cow defeats the purpose entirely
  • water is very good for you but sometimes more expensive than coffee
  • coffee is not a luxury
  • inviting someone for coffee when there are no biscuits in the house is rude (sorry jac)
  • marys are wonderful but need to be driven and therefore frustrating when you can see them from the bus stop
  • $700 electricity bills blow budgets out the door
  • children do not want working lights for xmas presents....I know, I asked em
  • fridges are very like toilets in that they do not ever clean themselves out of anything but junk food
  • hairy things in the fridge are not a good look
  • especially if they are green
  • when you are a STAFF and a customer jumps out from behind a rack of calenders and yells at you, you can be pretty sure it is a mary
  • and when a red headed customer you have never before seen in your life approaches you and asks where the 'Hairy Arse Crack' calenders are kept you can be damned sure it is a mary!
  • art students find it hard to clean up just so they can make more mess
  • if you go to charlestown square you are certain to bump into a mary somewhere....it is a proven fact
  • ....sometimes lots of marys, who werent even real people until yesterday and now they have faces
  • so wear your best frock and lippy in case you get caught out by marys
  • I like being a mary
  • I bet darlin' wishes he was a mary sometimes
  • fluff behind bathroom doors is just a part of life....... I only notice it when it turns into a doona
  • Bushells drinkers are FAKE coffee drinkers and don't deserve a headache if they stop
  • workshops are nerve wracking
  • assessments at art schools should be accumilative and not all in one week
  • sometimes life is a pain in the hairy arse crack but it is still GOOD
  • I am still the best marySTAFF and noone can change my mind...I am a calender COP and quite willing to punch out Michael Hill ladies on loud speakers that don't shut up all day long and drive maryBOSS insane and make her dribble sometimes

7 comments:

Elizabeth said...

great list of stuff dear Mary- no biscuits you say? obviously a need here for the 'rose cottage school of catering to marys'.
Also, yes, yesterday was a day of Mary's glad you got to meet Mary Cyndy & mini mary elly & got to meet fake coffee girl Jen who is nice & cute but also stressed ( like all Marys's) .
Im sure everyone who isnt a Mary wants to be a Mary, even darlin.........I will be back on calender duty next thursday so you have until then to make yourself irrreplaceable also re xmas- kids want gifts- even in the dark, they still want gifts.......
great list, much giggles cause cant laugh due to inflamed throat chakra.....
mary me x

Cyndy said...

If you want to impress MaryBoss, then I'd buy her earplugs...sorry for scaring a couple of your past lives out of you, Anchell...;)

rainbowspirit said...

You are a crack up...

And i CAN go without coffee and not get a headache - so nerah

You go girl - one question, can you paint by candlelight???

hugs to you
jen

Anchell said...

Only if you wish to go blind jen dear....and dont care about the outcome. Certainly not if you wish to stay in the lines!

Rylah said...

You are a funny bugger... :)

Cyndy said...

I couldn't see the numbers either...but the wax might make some nice effects..<3

Anchell said...

Yes....wax.....hmmmmm.....gotta go!